cobolhacker.com

so you need a comp on the cheap?

yeah.

i’ve got a decent one here for 150. athlon xp 2400. good condition. fixed it up nicely.

no no no i’m looking for 50. something that can run windows xp.

uhh, well, i’ve got this pentium 3.

no i need a pentium 4 at least, intel core if i can.

[you're on glue. no one sells a computer of that level of power at that price unless he is a thief or a retard.]

the 150 dollar athlon is the closest ive got. its even got a valid coa.

can’t take it for over 100.

the coa is worth 100 bucks alone, to say nothing about all the work i had to do on the hardware.

can’t do it. you’re wasting my time.

and then he pauses, as if he figures I’ll cave in somehow. who’s wasting who’s time here, mate?

sorry, i don’t think i can meet your needs. have a good day.

I sold that computer for $150 five days later.

Interesting article at the Torontoist about how public opinion surrounding Bill C-32 is being Astroturfed.

Seems the editors discovered a surprising amount of uniformity with pro-copyright comments and eventually discovered they are originating at a pro-copyright website almost certainly run by the CRIA. Michael Geist has some more analysis.

What I find interesting is the use of viral marketing on the Internet by people who are, in general, opposed to it, or at least what it stands for. Also interesting is these folks actually figured people were too stupid to find out, yet were able to recruit people to do it anyway.

I’ve often wondered how much it pays to be a shill. Surely it must pay something, because I have trouble believing people would do it for fun.

Digital image nerds will recognize this one.

I found it while looking through a bunch of old diskettes (yes I am that old).  Pretty girl with dark hair, big eyes and a hint of a smile, trying out a boa and a hat.  Used to be my Windows 3.1 background for a time. It is a cropping* of Lena Söderberg, Miss November 1972 in Playboy (this is what the centrefold looked like, in case you’re curious ;).

Believe it or not, it is one of the most, if not the most studied digital images in the world.  Image processing researchers have been using it as a baseline image for decades.  Numerous compression, resampling and colour timing systems have been tried out on Lena’s face over the years.

Supposedly USC researchers were getting bored with pictures of jellybeans and baboons so some dude’s copy of Playboy got used instead. That was around this time in 1973. For some reason it evolved into a de facto standard.

* I’m using the .png from Wikipedia because browsers don’t typically render .tiffs. Click on the picture and you’ll get an exact copy of what I have, right from the USC.

hello?

are you mr robert young?

sure.

i’m calling for **** ******* and i’m pleased to tell you that you have qualified for a free cell phone.

my lucky day. but i already have one. with your employers, actually.

oh. but this is a new one, sir, with unlimited night-time long distance, 1000 free text messages a month, your choice of four free services, all for the low price of…

yeah, yeah, yeah, but i like my current one. i really don’t need a new one.

i see, sir.

say, you sound a little bit down. it’s not me, is it?

pardon?

you’re having a bad day?

it has not been the best day, sir.

i know what that’s like. i used to do telemarketing too. some days you just can’t make a sale no matter what you do.

it is not that, i have reached all my goals today. you are my last call, actually.

ok so it’s not work, then what is it?

i’d rather not say.

come on. where is your call centre? it’s not like i will ever get to meet you.

bangalore.

if i may say so, you have an excellent phone voice.

thank you.

the english is perfect, the accent is great, a little hint of indian in there, actually it’s quite sultry. i don’t mean that in a disrespectful way, just that you sound great, like you should be on radio or movies or something.

hehe. all my friends say. you have a nice voice too. so deep, but… dark?

yeah well, dark, that’s me. if you knew what i knew you’d be dark too. so tell me, why are you sad?

umm…

come on, you can tell me.

my boyfriend and i separated yesterday.

that’s rough.

i told him that i wanted to get married and have children but i also wanted to have a career in journalism first. and what does he do? he leaves me for some other girl at the school.

that’s really harsh.

it was terrible.

if he’s going to be like that, you probably don’t want to be with him anyway.

yes i suppose. i can not believe i am telling you this.

you’re saying because i asked, but also because you know it is healthy to get it out.

yes. dad was furious. he and mom have been planning the wedding for years.

i’m not surprised.

all he wants is for me to marry well and give him many grandchildren. i tell him things are different these days. you don’t know what it is like.

no i don’t, but i can imagine.

i just want to meet the right guy.

he is elusive, the right guy. what i think you are looking for is a guy who’s willing to take out the trash, but also give you flowers.

yes.

a tough guy, a hard knuckle worker but yet a caring father and husband. the kind of guy children can look up to.

yes.

a do-right man, a moral man, but one who also satisfies your every desire in bed, then holds you close and tells you he loves you.

yes!

he’s gotta be out there somewhere so i say, you go get him, girl!

right. yes. yes! ok. i have to go. thank you so very much! have a very good day!

always happy to help. goodbye.