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If it is true that we should be voting for the party and not the local candidate, then I’d say the job of the party leader is most important. Not only will his mug sell the party, his ideas and his skills are central in shaping the future laws of the nation. This person needs to behave less like a snivelling politician and more like a confident leader. I’m not getting this from any of my current choices.

Who would I vote for?

I would vote for a leader who walks the walk and talks the talk of a leader, not some lines written for him by some back room hack. I want a candidate who’s smart enough and eloquent enough that he can brush off mistakes like dandruff on a collar.

I’d vote for a leader who is willing at every turn to pound into the minds of Canadian voters that it’s all for one and one for all in this land. It may seem unfair to Toronto voters that some of their tax money is going to build more transportation in the Yukon, but that’s the deal in Canada. That’s always been the deal in Canada. That will always be the deal in Canada.

I would vote for a guy who says what he means, and means what he says. Being wishy-washy on an issue always backfires anyway.

I would vote for a leader who isn’t afraid to say, “I will do more with more!” I want a candidate that looks straight at the people and says plainly that the government can give the people more if it gets more taxes. The people of Canada are among the least taxed in the Western World. The government can offer only so many programs with the taxes they collect. “If you want more programs you will have to pay more taxes,” I want my man to say. “Our promise to you is that we will use the money as efficiently as we can, and that we will find the smartest ways to take it.”

I would vote for a leader who has a hundred different ways to tell the Americans, “No,” all the while making them think that we are right by their side like a good little ally.

I’d vote for a guy who is willing recognise that sometimes you have to do what it takes, and to hell with the whining. Do we need to impound every foreign fishing boat on the Grand Banks? Fine. Is a National Energy Policy required to control spiralling fuel costs? Done. Does the American ambassador need to be told to shut the fuck up? Told. Do we need to put Toronto under martial law to fix the gun violence? “Just watch me.”

I’d vote for a leader who says, while he has no particular problem with private health care, he intends to make the public health care system so powerful that it isn’t worth competing against. “Universal health care is what sets us apart from the savages.” If the system doesn’t have the services or has long wait times then the system needs some attention. If that takes more money, then so be it.

I would vote for a leader who isn’t afraid to tell any other politician that he or she is full of shit. On national television.

I would vote for a leader who makes me proud. A person who the other world leaders look at and say, “Now that’s class. That’s how it’s done.”

Of course, with Canadian politics being the way they are, I’m not likely to get this leader any time soon, am I?